I wish I had a picture of it, but I don't, so I'll just have to describe it to you. Anyone traveling around York County, PA these days, which I've had the pleasure of doing twice in the past couple of weeks, will not be able to miss gigantic billboards advertising an upcoming ("PA's biggest") gun show. All right, that would be enough for a wingnut, do-good, want-stricter-gun-laws-that-at-
-in-this-country, crunchy-granola-latter-day-hippie gal like me, to be offended, especially when (oh boy!) "machine guns" are one of the billboard's great highlights. But wait, there's more, something to offend the "femi-Nazi" in me as well.
Guess what the picture on this billboard is. What might be appropriate would be a picture of a maimed child or dead wife, who is far more likely to be the recipient of a bullet from a gun bought at this show than that fictitious stranger, the one bent on breaking into your house while you are at home, from whom you desperately need to protect yourself. No one would ever show that, though. So, I will concede that we ought to have something that isn't quite so tasteless, right? Well, it's a gun show. You know, I was in Maryland for the sheep and wool festival over the weekend. Guess what the advertisements for this pictured. If you're guessing "sheep," well done! When I used to attend book shows, what did those advertisements depict? You're thinking "books?" Well done, again! So, what might be on a billboard for a gun show? Guns and bullets, right? Wrong!
Oh well, I guess guns just aren't as sexy as sheep and books are. I guess those who are into guns just aren't likely to take any notice of shows where they can purchase them unhindered by all those nasty federal laws that are trying to make sure that only criminals own guns. Nope. We need to do something to grab their attention, something that will get them to drag their asses to that gun show they're just so reluctant to attend. I know! A sexy woman will do the trick. So, let's slap a sexy-looking woman up on that billboard beside the words "machine guns" in big, bold letters.
That probably still isn't enough, though. I mean, these guys just badly need some real motivation to go to a show where they can salivate over deadly weapons. What we really, really need is to do something that gets men thinking "breasts and guns." How do we do that? Ahhh! I've got it. Let's paint some cartoon bulls eyes where the woman's breasts should be. Oh, come on! You think that's a horrible idea? You think that insinuates shooting at women's breasts? Or worse, killing women? You think it devalues women in some way? Where's your sense of humor? Boy, are you thin-skinned. What a wussy you are!
Oh, and God bless America, the Red, White, and Blue.