The Quest for the Perfect Day: A Tale by Emily Barton

The last time we saw the Princesses Emily, Marcy, and Becky, they were returning from their Quest for the Perfect Husband. Well, undeterred from that rather unsuccessful venture (after all, they are three quite intrepid princesses), they had agreed that the next time an irresistible quest presented itself they would set off again in the hopes of success.

Last December, they had meant to gather in pursuit of The Perfect Dessert. Emily had planned to mount her trusty Passat and head for the hills of Connecticut where Princess Marcy would welcome her into her lovely castle, while also welcoming Princess Becky (she of the delicious cakes and mince pies) from her nearby, neighboring kingdom, there to create the best dessert for the Big Company Holiday Event. But alas! Princess Emily had found herself plagued and bedridden on the day she was meant to set out on this quest (she is still convinced some evil fairy put a pea under her mattress). Princess Marcy was left to attend Big Company Holiday Event on her own.

Shortly thereafter, the snows set it, making it impossible for any princess to embark on any quest, no matter how important. But in the midst of the storms, Queen Judy (mother to Princess Marcy) declared that the princesses must, as soon as possible, set out to find The Perfect Day. Oh, and what could possibly be more irresistible than The Perfect Day?

The princesses, brave souls that they are, decided to defy The Farmer's Almanac prediction of a storm meant to leave Eastern Pennsylvania with 40 inches of snow by March 8th. It had been far too long since they'd been on their last quest together, and they were getting antsy (having, after all, spent months loving and caring for imperfect husbands, among other things). Despite Princess Becky being beckoned on another journey that would take her cross seas to the Land of Oxford mere days before their intended journey on March 6th, they still persevered in their Quest for the Perfect Day, and Princess Becky did manage to join Marcy and Emily (albeit somewhat dazed and confused and constantly wondering, "now where am I?").

Unfortunately, Princess Emily did not get off to an auspicious start and began to worry that this would be as futile a quest as The Perfect Husband had been. Two days before her intended departure date, the trusty Passat began to feel sickly. However, the Prius (always trusty, if not quite as comfortable and missing such accoutrements as CD players and seat warmers for spasm-y backs) sprang to action and volunteered to be Princess Emily's steed to the Kingdom of Philadelphia. After all, Philadelphia was but a short journey, and Prius would be extra careful to make sure Princess Emily did not suffer any unnecessary pain, because pain certainly would not be part of The Perfect Day. True to its word, Prius did manage to transport her to her destination without causing her sensitive, princess-like back to spasm.

But then, she arrived at the appointed meeting place to be greeted by an Ugly Troll. Obviously, those at Castle Barnes, where the princesses had planned to meet up in order to begin their search for The Perfect Day, immersed in beautiful art in a magnificent setting, do not really take kindly to visitors. The Ugly Troll was very reluctant to let poor, innocent-looking Princess Emily in (despite her obvious royalty), because a. she could not answer his nasty, tricky question about the magic number only Princess Marcy knew, which would open the gates and b. she seemed to be insistent on bringing in a steed whose spot had not been reserved.

Will Princess Emily be admitted to Barnes Castle? Will Princesses Marcy and Becky ever find her if she is not? Will The Perfect Day be as elusive as The Perfect Husband? Find out in the next episode of The Quest for the Perfect Day (all of which is a fancy way of saying "To be continued...)