Thursday, December 16, 2010

Dog and Cat

CLARE'S STORY

Ohboy!oh boy!ohboy! You've come to listen to my story. I'm just so, so happy about that! Wait a minute. Before we get started, will you give me a belly rub? Oh, thankyou!thankyou!thankyou! You are just terrific!

Anyway, a little over a week ago, I came to live with these two people. It's been great fun so far! I have my own crate where I sleep at night. I have my own bed, where I sleep and chew things during the day. They take me outside for walks, and there's so much to sniff and see and do. It's so exciting! Really, I promise you.

There's only one problem. The house is haunted. Every so often, I encounter this strange, orange, striped beast. Oh, it's horrible! It growls at me and makes this very odd noise that sounds like it's having trouble breathing. It's a sort of a "ssssssss" sound. But I won't tell you anymore. You wouldn't want to hear it. I'm putting up a brave front for the humans, though. If they would only let me, I'm sure I could chase it away.

Oh well, that is the only bad thing about this really, really awesome place. I've gotta run now, so I can go outside and eat some sticks and acorns.



FRANCIS'S STORY

This used to be a safe haven, a place where I could sleep 18 hours a day. The only things I had to protect everyone from were dustballs, moths, and the occasional stray hair tie. But not anymore. No sleeping for me. Now, I have to remain ever vigilant, and the only way I can get any sleep is to hide under a quilt.

You see, we have been attacked and are being held hostage by this horrible beast that makes whining and yipping noises and races toward me whenever it sees me. Somebody, please help! I am afraid we will all die from lack of sleep and relaxation if this goes on much longer.

7 comments:

Stefanie said...

Poor Francis. My previous cat had a fit when we brought home a puppy but then later resigned himself to its presence and learned some awesome and hilarious intimidation tactics that continued to work up until his demise when the dog weighed twice as much as he did. Perhaps Francis can try a kitty seance and see if the spirit of Kamir will give him some advice.

As for Clare, is she ever adorable!

Emily Barton said...

Stef, I think Francis is slowly, but surely, coming around. The two actually touched noses the other night (after which, he, of course, hissed at her and walked away, leaving her completely confused). Maybe he will eventually find her as adorable as we do.

Smithereens said...

Ahahah, thanks for making me laugh! With these two, you sure will have a lot of drama at home!

litlove said...

There used to be a lovely advert on tv (for gas fires, I think) in which the cat came in, kissed noses with the dog and settled down on the hearth rug, then a mouse came in, kissed noses with the cat and settled down alongside it, too. Here's hoping the magic of Christmas will restore harmony! Very cute puppy. And Francis is gorgeous, of course.

Dorothy W. said...

Clare is adorable!! I can't wait to meet her. I'm glad to hear Francis is coming around.

Carrie#K said...

Two sides to every story. I hope, for Francis's sake that Clare is settling in, settling down & being reconciled to the haunting presence.

Cam said...

So cute! Clare and I would be fast friends, while I'm sure that Francis would stalk me just like every other cat I've ever met. :).