True Isolation

Imagine arriving at your place of employment one day, eager to attack the tons of work that awaits you after just having taken off two days (because this is 95% more likely to happen if you’ve just taken some time off). As you walk up from the parking lot, approaching the double glass doors of the office building, you discover a chest-high barrier erected all around the building's perimeter, blocking your entry. You’re standing there, puzzling over this situation, wondering what on earth this barrier is doing here, when you see one of your colleagues approaching. Ah, some help. Maybe the two of you can figure this out together. But then, your colleague does an amazing thing. She leaps right over the barrier and waltzes on through the doors.

Well, that didn’t look too hard. Maybe you can leap over that barrier, too. You take off your sandals, back up to get a nice running start, and launch yourself at what you think is just the right moment. Instead of sailing over the barrier, as you imagined yourself doing, though, you come crashing down into it, and are left in a crumpled heap still sitting on the parking-lot side of it. You stand up and dust yourself off, while checking for broken bones. Meanwhile, that smug guy from accounting you’ve never liked comes prancing up the sidewalk. He’s laughing at you as he manages to maneuver the barrier like a first-place horse at a steeplechase. Right behind him is that good-looking guy from marketing. You step aside, hoping Mr. Good-looking wasn’t also a witness to your failed attempt, and watch him as he practically steps over the barrier. He doesn’t even back up to give himself any kind of a running start (well, you always knew there was something special about him).

Many more of your fellow employees manage to make it across that barrier while you stand there, wondering if you should attempt it again. This is getting ridiculous. You’d planned to be at work early and were hoping you’d have at least something done by now. You can see everyone else inside, sitting at their computers, getting their (much-less-important-than-your) work done.

It looks like the coast is temporarily clear, so you decide to attempt another leap, with less success than the first. Undeterred, you try again. And again. And again. Finally, you have to admit that you’re just not an Olympic high jumper, even if everyone else who works for the company is. So, now you wonder what you should do. Maybe you should go to Starbucks and get some coffee and see if the barrier’s been removed by the time you return. Maybe you should see if there’s any work you can do sitting outside the building. Maybe you should take the day off and go home and do some work around the house. And, as you try to make up your mind, that damn clock just keeps ticking away, while all your important files lie tantalizingly just beyond your reach.

Welcome to the world of the telecommuter when the company web server is on the blink.